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Ever see that Kevin Costner movie 'Waterworld'? Imagine that in song form, except with semen instead of water.


Lost in a world brought down to its knees
Caught in a typhoon of semen and knob cheese
Forced to set sail in a world swept away
Doused in creamy peril since that fateful day

I mourn for those lost in this man juice holocaust

Oh this love custard
Drenched from head to toe,
On this sea of dread
Charting the unknown,
Oh this love custard
The horizon’s pale
As we ride these waves
The sea men set sail

Near to our end never to be free
There is no escaping this global bukkake
Search for a shore that ever evades
Fleeing from the tyranny of syphilis and AIDS

I mourn for those lost in this sex wee holocaust

There’s no place to go and no safe haven awaits
We are shot forth unto pearly gates
The whole world is drowning humanity is lost
In sweaty man mucus vessels are tossed

Yeah it’s everywhere
It’s in your hair
Vision impaired

Now the world is nought but dust cemented in my juice,
Sprung forth from the phial of my lust my member and I make this truce
To never lay hand to flesh again to never swoon in ecstasy
To never fall to the needs of man oh spunk-filled symphony
And now I sit upon my throne with oils and juices aplenty
Unfulfilled and wasted I sit alone, flaccid coarse and empty

Nothing can I see in my view from my turgid man-juice tower
No blade of grass no sea of blue no animal nor flower
I try to stand upon my feet but my legs they do not budge
From the ice-white oozing prison of my own orgasmic sludge
What is this oh what is this, this newfound devilry?
That does hold me in a chrysalis that does thus torment me
My jeans are stuck and my back is bent and I am much afraid
That this is the cost of a world long spent, a debt that must be paid

All that remains now the world is through
Is a vast viscous ocean of sticky white goo
But nevermind things could still be worse
We could be adrift in blood and afterbirth

I mourn for those lost in this love junk holocaust


from Every Hole Is A Goal (2011), released October 1, 2011
Everything by Footprints In The Custard.

Recorded/Mixed by Ian Fraser at Filth Wizard Studios in Manchester.



all rights reserved


Footprints In The Custard Manchester, UK

In the summer of 2006, a group of bored college students decided to form a band. Pizza, Whisky and Pepto Bismal. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect band. But Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction... Chemical X.

Thus Footprints In The Custard were born!

Three albums, an EP and a Christmas single later, no one has died or gone on fire. Yet.
... more

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