Oh God, It's Warm (2007), by Footprints In The Custard

Oh God, It's Warm (2007)

by Footprints In The Custard

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The debut album by Footprints In The Custard.

The original South Cheshire College sessions remixed and remastered for 2011, complete with digital booklet with corrected lyrics, credits and thanks.

Includes the fan favourites 'Wank', 'On The Internet' and 'Swallow (Or It's Going In Your Eye)'.

Available for free download, or pay what you want. Shirts are also available on the 'Every Hole Is A Goal' page.

Purchasable with gift card

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Pickleweasel T-Shirt
T-Shirt/Apparel + Digital Album
Pickleweasel shirt, designed by Alex 'Beak' Heathcock and Shaun Martland. Printed by Ruth Vidler.

All designs are printed on Fruit of the Loom shirts.

Available in Black or White for Men and Women. Plus some Gren and Purple tie-dye beasts!

Please note: The shirts are all made by hand in a local studio and as such, the quality varies significantly - you're paying for a taste of grungy nostalgia rather than a high-end product!

Includes unlimited streaming of Oh God, It's Warm (2007) via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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1.	Goddamnit Whitty 00:44	lyrics	buy track
Goddamnit Whitty
2.	The Pickleweasel 03:22	lyrics	buy track
He’s coloured green and purple And lives deep underground He takes his victims skulls And piles them in a mound His unsuspecting prey He kidnaps in the night And takes them to his burrow Lit by lantern light He is the Pickleweasel He’ll get you in your sleep And skin you all alive And eat your fucking feet He pickles all the corpses And hangs them from the ceiling He is weasel king And everyone’s kneeling He sits upon his throne With a skull full of whisky He’s also quite partial To the Polish beer Tyskie He offers all his prayers To Chuck Norris, the weasel God And people say his moon dance Is beautiful but odd
3.	Wank 02:23	lyrics	buy track
Wank Wank, wank, wank I wanna wank Wank in your eye Wank in your ear Wank in your nose Wank in your mouth Wank in your couch Wank in your mum Wank in your back door Wank in your fucking shitter Let me wank Please I would like to wank
4.	Swallow (Or It's Going In Your Eye) 04:19	lyrics	buy track
Swallow or it's going in your eye Stings so bad you wish you could die Felt this pain a million times Can't escape the bloodshot line Gargle or it's going up your nose In your hair and down your clothes 'Cause the contents of my scrote Will be emptied down my throat You need to find in your mind A way to taste my glue Swallow or it's going in your eye Can't resist but at least you can try Feel my thrusting pole Explode out of control Comply or it's going in your ears A sensation at the peak of your fears 'Cause I know you're the one That I want to explode upon Swallow, swallow, swallow my jizz
5.	Rik's Dick 00:49	info	buy track
6.	Me And My Ironing Board 04:01	lyrics	buy track
Deep in my heart, deep in my soul There’s something missing, I’m not whole There is something I don’t have Nothing for you to grasp All my nights I can’t sleep Knowing I am incomplete I have nothing left to lose Nothing for your hands to use I know I can never be Anymore than you now see So please don’t tell me lies When you look into my eyes Place your hands upon my chest Say you’ll always love me best But when your hands find nothing there Tell me truly you don’t care Out of my heart, out of my soul My life is rushing to a close All around me people see Everything I fail to be Can you not see that I am lost? For my crimes I’ve paid the cost I wish I could be complete Become part of the elite
7.	Desperate Urges 03:30	lyrics	buy track
I need to express My greatest need All I desire Is to release My need to wee Oh, I feel so strongly about this wee It’s everything that makes me be If I did not need this piss Think of all those things I’d miss This dripping water in my mind Makes my desperation rise If I do not urinate Soon it will be too late I miss the sound I miss the smell I miss the taste I miss the texture Of my pee Smelly wee Oh my God it burns I can’t believe how much it burns I cannot express My ultimate distress I’m just not well Let’s unleash hell Unzip me Free the wee
8.	Send Me West 01:36	lyrics	buy track
Whoa mate I’m gonna stab ya Whoa mate I’m gonna break your legs I go to the park after dark And I’ll stab ya with my knife Then I go home and smoke some weed Then I’ll go screw ya wife I go outside in my bling bling Whoa mate I’m the real thing And with my posse I’m gonna do you over Go home, get pissed and wake up with a real hangover I go to the pitch with my bitch With my Nike trousers tucked into my socks And then I go home and fuck my bird ‘Cause she’s got some real big knocks I go home listen to my real big mix And then I’m gonna mess with my hydraulics I turn my cap all around I’m real solid mate and uh... I’ll bang ya out!
9.	Back To My Roots 04:04	info	buy track
10.	Strain Your Heart Out 05:07	lyrics	buy track
10. Strain Your Heart Out Brown empties from my soul To be sucked through this blackened hole Eternity breathes a sigh of relief An ecstasy at the end of grief The room is enchanted with this blissful smell Just sigh and give it hell Strain Strain your heart out Pain In pain you cry and shout Rain It rains it’s grief on you Gain Nothing to gain or lose Doom spirals through this world Destroying everything you’ve hurled Blasphemy exits from your region As an evil, tormented demon The room is annihilated in this horrid despair You have made this your unloading lair Spinning turmoil eats your life Jabbing your muscles like a jagged knife Blood dripping through your espionage crew Nothing left for us to do What can we do?
11.	The Ballad Of Kelly 02:53	lyrics	buy track
Holy shit you’re fucking disgusting Your one ring must be rusting I’d never put my finger inside The deep dark depths where the orcs all hide I’m not touching your Mt. Doom And neither would Orlando Bloom Cast a spell to hide your face You’re Middle Earth’s sickest disgrace Have you ever seen someone so ugly you could die? So hideous that you could skull-fuck Sauron’s eye Or do it with a dwarf and get it in his beard ‘Cause a girl who looks like Smeagol is something to be feared Hobbits live in hills for reasons To side from you throughout the seasons You’re the reason the Ring-Wraiths screech And fly so high out of reach I’m not touching your giant eagle Not with a face like fucking Smeagol You should be locked up in a cage So say the Elves, wise and aged
12.	On The Internet 02:59	lyrics	buy track
Hey, where have I seen you before? You're that internet cam whore! The other day when I was surfing the net Saw some pics of you getting wet. Seen your minge! (I've seen your) Seen your minge! (I've seen your) Seen your minge! (I've seen your) Minge On The Internet! Hey, where do I know you from? Sure it isn't FacialAbuse.com? The other day when I was whacking off Saw some pics of your muff! Oh, fuck me! Can it be The girl I saw the night before? On the net and dripping wet Showing her tits and all her bits.
13.	My Best Friend 02:40	info	buy track
14.	Fade Away 07:03	lyrics	buy track
It all started long ago I was happy then, I know There were just the little things Until the hunger spread its wings The diameter increase Just seemed never to then cease And say that the worst has passed But my fears are getting vast Why won’t this all just fade away? Deep into the blackened night Why won’t this all just fade away? When will it all be alright? So as time sustained a roll My life was engulfed whole Everything I used to love Crushed me flat from above I found I could not endure So I ran right for the door Still my problem seems to be My problem’s twice as big as me.

about

The humble beginnings of the Punk-Metal tours de farce, Footprints In The Custard.

Released originally in 2007 as a short run of CDs.

Raw, raunchy and filled with genuine teenage fapping!

credits

released October 8, 2007

Vocals: Russ Custard
Guitars: Kyle Mcsweeny
Other Guitars: Matthew 'Whitty' Whitworth
Bass: Matt Evans
Drums: Ian Fraser

Recorded and originally mixed at South Cheshire College by Ian Fraser.
Remixed and remastered at Filth Wizard Studios, Manchester in 2011 by Ian Fraser

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about

Footprints In The Custard Manchester, UK

Award-winning Party Metal Band from Manchester, UK.

Heavy and catchy tunes about partying, smelly genitals, unusual sexual habits, and bears.

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